Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Of Doyle's condition and RIP Robin Williams~~~~

Hello Darklings,

I'm sure the news has now spread around the world, except where there is fighting, that Robin Williams took his own life and has passed away.

He was only 63, and had been suffering from depression for a long time, as a matter of fact he could be the poster boy for those suffering from acute depression.

It's very sad that such a brilliant and funny man could be so depressed about whatever factors that troubled him in life.

They say that it's not a condition but a disease.  I will accept that.

But I have to say that in many ways I don't fully understand it, unless it is something that is neurological or that it is something chemical with in one's body in which an overwhelming sadness blinds a person to the point where only ending your life seems like the only solution.

I myself as well as my family members have been struck with depression, the horrible murder of my eldest brother, which took much of the light out of our lives, but some how we managed to persevere and took what he taught us to a higher course.

My father fought in World War II and saw so much horrible death and destruction, how it weighed heavy on his mind and heart and yet some how with the support of my Mother, his wife and his own Mother and later my sister and I we helped him cope with it.

But my Mother and her Mother I feel suffered the most, first the two deaths of my Mother's older sisters, in the 1930's when there was no cure for many diseases or any surgical procedures for heart surgery, both of them beautiful, young, talented, then the death of her favorite Uncle his chest crushed by heavy equipment, then the death of Grandpa, and then Grandma, followed by the death of Mom's brother due to incurable cancer and then my brother, and I seeing burned to death my best friend and much later the death of a dear friend from AIDS.

When Mom was well advanced in age long after the death of our Dad I asked Mom "What keeps you going?  I would have rolled over and given up."   She replied "Take me to church" and I did it was open for evening mass and we went into a anteroom where there were statues of several Saints and one of the Pieta, Mom pointed to that statue and said "If she had to endure it, so can I, she gives me strength.  I had to remind your father of that when he came home from the war, there is always suffering, we all have our peaks and valley's, when it is really bad for me, late at night I say the Rosary, and then I finish with the 23rd Psalm.  There are those who have a hard time enduring anything, I don't know why, but my Faith has helped me."

I took what she said to heart, but I do know that there are those who no matter what cannot get past that valley, chronic or clinical depression needs to be looked at more deeply, it is obvious if a talented man like Robin Williams could not overcome it, some thing is wrong. 

I wonder if Robin Williams was Joseph Grimaldi re-incarnated.   Joseph Grimaldi was a clown, on several levels, he was a physical clown much like what you see in circus's, slap-stick, as well as a verbal comedian, circus clowns are called Joey's in honor of Grimaldi.

There is a story and it is believed to be true that a doctor who was know to be a specialist in mental conditions as well as  physical saw a man who was the saddest man he'd ever seen, he checked the man physically and determined that there was nothing wrong with him.  So he told the man "there is nothing wrong with you, you need to laugh and find humor in things, what you need to do is go and see Joseph Grimaldi, he is the funniest man in the world, go and see him to make you laugh."

The sad man said to the Doctor "But Doctor I am Grimaldi."  So it is possible that Grimaldi also suffered from chronic depression and yet he worked to make people laugh.

This theme was carried out in the Opera "I Paligachi" (sp) in the aria sung by the tenor he sings "Laugh Clown, though it's breaking your heart"

What broke Robin Williams heart I don't think we'll ever know.  He's left this world a little sadder by his leaving, so we need to look at his body of work to make us laugh all over again.

Now about Doyle-----We saw his regular Doctor today and there is the possibility that although the antibiotics have done their work, there is still a small sort of cyst that appears to contain pus from the infection, we'll know more when we see the Urologist at the end of this week, but Doyle may have to have a needle inserted to drain it to finally get Doyle over the last little hump, we'll know more in a few days.

Of course when Doyle was told the possibility of this he seriously winced and later said to me "Now I know for sure I've should have kicked that guy in the nuts.  Next time I will."  Yes my Bogart tough guy, next time go for it.

Right now I have lasagna baking in the oven, with lots of ricotta cheese, a good red wine, and a tossed salad with a wine vinaigrette dressing.  I'm not sure about dessert, but I think chilled peaches will do and Sis bought some orange sherbet last night so I will top them with that.   To be followed by a Pink Panther movie,  yes some comedy is now in order.

Later Darklings 


  1. The news really shocked me when I found out Robin Williams had died from an apparent suicide. It's sad to lose a comedic genius, especially since we lost Harold Ramis not too long ago. Both men had a huge impact on my childhood as well as my parents' generation. I loved to watch Ghostbusters and Groundhog day (and repeatedly still do), and I've practically been raised on Robin Williams considering he was in so many children's films. That was the kind of comedy that could be watched by both adult and child while maintaining a degree of tastefulness. Now comedians are disgusting and know no boundaries of taste or class.

    As hard as it is to swallow that Williams committed suicide, it spent a long time coming. He states in multiple interviews that he's considered it many times throughout his life. If you've been thinking about it for all those years then it's not been successfully treated yet. I just wonder what kind of psychiatrist he had to let him go on like that. I understand what he was going through, but I'm only limited by my personal experience, seeing as how I didn't make dozens of popular films and don't have much money lol. When you're depressed and thinking about suicide your mind changes, it doesn't function normally. You aren't thinking about how suicide will impact everybody else, because you aren't thinking about anybody but yourself. Even if you are mourning the loss of a loved one, when you consider suicide it's about oneself. Suicide is seen as escapism for physical pain or mental anguish.

    I was reading an article, which unfortunately I can't locate right now, but it described the thought of suicide as being a powerful state of mind which consumes you and blinds you from everything else. The article said that when you realize that the world doesn't match your ideals you feel a profound sense of failure, one that overwhelms you and becomes very difficult to overcome. If you obsess over it, you aren't taking the appropriate measures to work through the problem. Instead you will only end up falling deeper into a cycle of depression which should be treated professionally. There are some people who really thinking they can self treat and often times use drugs or alcohol in the process which really only makes things worse.

    It's a shame someone didn't intervene and prevent him from making that decision, but there's only so much you can do and so much that you're aware of. I hid my depression from so many friends, in fact, if you asked some of them they still to this day would deny I could ever shed a tear! I don't blame or criticize Robin for taking the path that he did, I almost did the same once too. I'm just lucky that I managed to pull through somehow.

    And lastly I agree, Doyle should have kicked him in the balls! It's unfortunate he's had to go through this.

    1. In many ways I agree with you Ladyfair, the concept of really thinking that suicide is the only way out, cannot be understood by those who have never fallen into such a deep depression that never seems to lift.

      One psychiatrist, in an interview the other day said that for a number of people who suffer from chronic depression, the use of drugs or alcohol only makes it worst and in essence does damage to certain neuron reaches of the brain in which such damage is irreversible, and makes treating chronic depression extremely difficult.

      He said that this was not copping out on treatment just that if not monitored very closely can lead to the ultimate act.

      He continued in saying that once one can finally balance how they would like life to be and how it really is, is the first major step in managing it. That there is no real cure, only accepting the fact that in life there is peaks and valleys and developing mechanisms to cope with it.

      Of course I'm over simplifying what he said, but that was it in a very small nut shell.

      I remember my Mother after Grandma died, had a hard time coping, Dad said to us kids, someone needs to be with her at all times, so we even enlisted a neighbor lady who was a retired nurse and understood these things, she would encourage Mom to make lunches for us kids, sort and fold laundry, a lot of almost mechanical things, until she was through that first part but Mom just would not laugh, she'd turn away from the T.V. go to church every morning and pray, until finally one day I said to her "Mom we're going to see a play tonight, a friend of mine is performing in it" It's was community theatre and the play we went to see was "Arsenic and old Lace" and my friend could really look like Boris Karloff with a bit of make-up.

      There is something almost contagious being in a live theatre setting, if one person laughs it starts others laughing, Mom started to laugh, after 6 months she started to laugh.

      Oh she was not over her depression, there were set backs but, she finally found her coping mechanism. And sometimes when it was bad for her she'd call Dad at work, and he made it clear that if she called to put her through immediately even when he was at a meeting.

      One time he was at a meeting a very important one and her call was put through, he asked for a minute to get it, Listened to her and said "I understand what you're feeling, what I want you to do is say the rosary and as soon as I'm done here I'll call you back immediately" and he'd tell her what kind of meeting and approximate time, and he never failed he'd call back.

      His Boss was a bit upset but my Dad stood up to him and said "I truly hope you will have compassion should your wife ever have to deal with depression and tragedy and you're not there to comfort her" Dad could have lost his job, he didn't.

      Eventually Mom got through it but it was a family effort, and I think having a strong sense of Faith helped as well.

      About Doyle, considering what might be next, well I would have been right there Helping him kick the other guys' balls and wearing pointy toed stiletto's as well.